Ever since the mid-2000s, conservatives in Singapore have countered activism for LGBT equality by using slogans that proclaim they are "pro-family" or catchphrases that purport to "protect the family".

To remedy this, LGBT activists have periodically emphasised that they have families too and that they love their families as much as their straight counterparts do, and that the narrow official definition of what constitutes a family should be broadened to include a diverse spectrum of social structures.

Promoting the concept of one's "chosen family"[]

The concept of “chosen family” or “family of choice” is a term that refers to a non-biologically related group of people established to provide ongoing social support. It is based on chosen bonds, not biological ones, and is common within the LGBT community, groups of veterans, supportive communities overcoming addiction or childhood abuse, and friend groups who have little to no contact with their biological parents.

The term “chosen family” originated within the LGBTQ community and was used to describe early queer gatherings like the Harlem Drag Balls of the late nineteenth century. However, it wasn’t until the 1980s that the term gained widespread use in the LGBT community as a way to counter the narrative that they are against the traditional family.

In Singapore, the term only came into relatively widespread use in the 2020, especially when LGBT activists organised photo exhibitions to showcase their inclusive non-traditional families.

IPS' Singapore Perspectives 2024, "Youth and Family" panel[]

During the Institute of Policy Studies' Singapore Perspectives 2024 conference held on Monday, 29 January 2024 at the Sands Expo and Convention Centre, a video entitled "To Be Honest: Building a Family" was screened as part of the "Youth & Family" panel. Amongst a diverse selection of families featured, Pink Dot spokesman Clement Tan recounted his growing up experiences, being in a same-sex relationship and what defines a "successful" family[1].

Gurmit Singh on his queer icon daughter Gabrielle[]

On 1 January 2025, Channel NewsAsia premiered the inaugural episode of "The Assembly" in which 23 neurodivergent participants were brought together to engage its first guest - 59 year-old actor, comedian and host Gurmit Singh[2],[3].

Transcript of Singh's response to a question about his daughter Gabrielle, 27, who works as a drag and burlesque performer with the stage name of Lychee Bye. (Note: Gabrielle is currently known as Worms, and prefers the pronouns "they" and "them". They have worked with the likes of local drag show Riot! and the Perth International Burlesque Festival. They also previously hosted their own monthly show, Sunz and is the founder of The Fruit Basket programme to train upcoming drag kings and queens. Gurmit last took the stage with Worms at the Watch It Wet – NDP 2024 Watch Party. In 2014, when Worms was 17, they went viral for penning an open letter to fast fashion retailer, Forever 21, calling them out for playing a misogynist rap song in their stores. Gurmit married his wife Melissa Wong in 1995, and they have two other children: Elliot, 22, and Mikaela, 11.)

LycheeBye002 — Gabrielle/Worms/Lychee Bye.

Stephanie Fam (39 year old woman with cerebral palsy): Your oldest daughter Gabrielle is a very well known icon of the queer community. How did you come to accept it?

Gurmit Singh: Yeah, so she has taken that path and it was difficult at first because she's in the queer community. She does a show that's not TV-friendly for sure. But at the end the day, she is still my daughter. Till the day I die, I was still love her. You know, like they say: Hate the game, don't hate the player. We may have differing opinions of things, and career paths and life choices, but she's still my flesh and blood. I'll still be there in the blink of an eye if she needs me. I also kind of reconcile that and akin that to when I made a decision to become an actor. My parents had high hopes for me to become a lawyer, judge or whatever...policeman. And then I became this comedian, an actor. So, as far as Gabrielle is concerned, as a parent, as long as she is happy, I'm happy. It may not be what I want to be or what I had hoped she would choose, but as long as it's legal and she's happy with it, I'm happy with it.

Another woman participant: A lot of Singaporeans may still not accept her identity as queer. So, do you sometimes worry about her safety, whether it be physically or mentally, in Singapore?

Gurmit Singh: In terms of mental wellbeing, she used to be very, very shy. She used to be afraid of how people think of her. So in that respect, this orientation has helped to defeat that. And I'm only speaking on her behalf but she used to be ashamed of her body. But somehow being in this community, she shared with me, has made her less of that. She's proud of her skin, what she is and how she is. So in some respect, I can appreciate where she is now as far as mental wellbeing is.

References[]

Acknowledgements[]

This article was written by Roy Tan.

LGBT families in Singapore

Contents

Promoting the concept of one's "chosen family"[]

IPS' Singapore Perspectives 2024, "Youth and Family" panel[]

Gurmit Singh on his queer icon daughter Gabrielle[]

See also[]

References[]

Acknowledgements[]